Ayden's Getting Bigger

Ayden likes to pucker his lips together, its pretty dang cute!




My little baby is getting bigger! He hasn't fit into his newborn clothes since last week :( I know he is only three weeks old, but he is growing so fast! On Monday he had a doctor's appointment and he was 9 pounds 3 ounces. He is turning into a little chunk, he eats a ton. He act's like we haven't fed him in forever every time he eats. The last 2 nights have been hard one's. He's having a hard time sleeping. He squirms and makes noises and wakes himself up. Hopefully this isn't permanent! Although I have a feeling that my luck with the quiet baby is running out :( He is lucky he is so cute, cause even when he wakes me up all night I cant be mad at that little face looking up at me. Ya know, when we have to just let him cry at night I don't know if I'll be able to do it! I feel horrible when he cries, he makes these sad little faces and his cry is just so sad! The other night I was doing dishes downstairs and had the water running, I think he had been crying for a while when I finally heard him. When I went up to get him he had the saddest face, like "How could you just ignore me!" Anyways, I think we might be going up to Pima for the 4th of July weekend! I'm excited cause it's been so long since I have been anywhere!

Life As A Mommy!

Ayden chillin in his vibrating chair

Ayden Sneezing!

I can't resist that cute little face looking up at me!

Ayden sleeping oh so peacefully!

So life as a mommy is definitely unlike anything I could have ever imagined. Nothing can prepare you for how different life is with this new little person. I can't help but stare at him all day, I mean he is just the cutest baby I have ever seen! Every move and facial expression he makes is adorable, I just can't get over it. He is such a good baby too. He hardly cries at all, he is just so calm and content with the world. Today we took him to see the cardiologist and they put all these stickers on his chest and hooked him up to this machine. He was wide awake, but he just kinda sat there very calmly and let the lady do her thing. I'm so grateful for having a quiet baby. I don't know if I could make it if he cried all the time. Even though he doesn't like his mommy to sleep much at night, he is at least quiet. He is really confusing his nights and day's. Poor little guy, he just wants to play and have fun, when his daddy and me are ready to pass out. Although the last couple of days he has been up more during the day, and it is so fun to play with him when he's up. He loves to be held when he's up. We bought him one of those vibrating chairs, and I don't think he is really all that into it. He just kinda sits there like, "hello, pick me up". Another thing he is starting to do is smile. I'm not sure if he really knows he's smiling, or if he has gas but he has been doing little smile's lately and it's SO cute! He has two. One is this big open mouth grin, and the second is this closed mouth, cute smile. I know it doesn't sound very exciting, but I get so excited every time he does it. I can't wait until he is actually smiling at us, on purpose! I really don't believe that I am actually a mommy. That I will always have this little guy in my life. I just feel so blessed to be the mommy of the cutest, sweetest little baby in the world.

He is finally here!!!!

Well, it finally happened! Ayden Donald Cluff was born on June 10, 2007 at 12:15 p.m. My water started breaking at 9 the night before and we didn't go to the hospital till around 1 in the morning. We waited in triage for three hours to make sure my water was actually breaking, cause it didn't actually "break" it just leaked for hours. So eventually they figured out that I actually was in labor and Ayden was REALLY coming. Which scared the crap out of us, cause I don't think either Brian or Me actually thought I was really in labor. So anyways, once we finally got into the labor and delivery room my contractions were starting to get really bad. I waited a couple of hours before I finally got my epidural. And I must say, epidurals are literally a lifesaver! I was so happy after mine, there is no way I would ever choose to not get one! I got it pretty much at just the right time, cause if I would have waited any longer i don't think I would have been able to get it cause it went so fast after that. I went from 5 to 8 to 10 centimeters in like an hour! And then he came, they told me to look down and I could see his little head and arms wiggling all over. It was such a special moment when he came out. Brian and I just kept saying we love each other and smiling. I cried like a little baby. Apart from our wedding, that was the most emotional, special moment I have ever had in my life. There is just nothing like seeing this little thing that YOU created for the first time. It really brought me closer to Brian. WE made this thing together, it is just amazing! I am just on cloud 9 right now. I have a wonderful, caring, helpful husband and a beautiful baby boy! I am the luckiest girl in the world! So I'm gonna post a bunch of pictures, which I will probably do ALOT of from now on!

Doctor's Visit

So I woke up this morning and I just didn't feel right. I woke up around 9, stayed up for less than an hour and fell back asleep until 1. I just felt really icky. Then I realized that I hadn't felt the baby kick hardly at all, which is very unusual cause he usually kicks ALL DAY LONG! So anyways, I went to the doctors and everything was fine. Even though I haven't progressed at all since last week :(. I mentioned that the baby hadn't kicked hardly at all today. So just to be safe they sent us over to the hospital. We went to triage and they monitored the baby's heart. It was a little bit slow, so they decided they wanted to do an ultrasound to just make sure everything was all right. We waited forever! We were there for like 3 hours. Thank goodness everything was alright. The baby is fine, although he still isn't kicking very much. I just worry too much I think. It's hard though to go from him kicking all day long, all the time to nothing. It feels like he isn't even in there. I miss him :( It's kinda scary not knowing how he is doing in there, I'm worried that something could be wrong and I wouldn't know it. Cant wait until he is out and I can keep a better eye on him!

I Passed!!!

Woowho! I passed my state board test! I am now a licensed cosmetologist! I took my test on May 31, and they just barely posted it this morning. It was SO stressful waiting for the test results. I just feel like I can take a deep breath now (that is if baby would let me :)). It feels so good to be done with everything, well almost everything. Now all I have to do is have this baby! I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, so we will see how much I progressed. Last week I was 1 1/2 centimeters dialated and 75% effaced. So i'll cross my fingers and hopefully I will have progressed at least a little. It's kinda exciting going in each week to see how far im getting. Although, at the same time its kinda scary cause it is getting closer and closer.

Will Ayden EVER come out!?!

I never really fully understood pregnant women when they complained about the last couple of weeks and how hard they are. I thought they were just complaining and overreacting. But whoee, do I know what they mean now! Life is just so hard! :) I just finished school and I have only been out a week, but I'm going crazy! There is NOTHING to do all day long! Day's seem to go by super slow, and Ayden is really starting to wear out his welcome in there. This last week has been so uncomfortable. He literally feels like he is gonna fall out any minute. But his due date isn't for 2 more weeks. I don't know how much more of this I can handle before I go insane. Then again as much as I want him to come out, I'm terrified for him to. Labor scares the crap out of me! I haven't been able to take any child birth classes, so I don't really know much about how this is all gonna work. Pretty much the only thing I have heard about having a baby is how much it hurts. Not very comforting. But I know that whatever happens, happens. It will only be a short moment of my life, and of course Ayden is worth it. Still cant help feeling a little anxious though!

I wanna talk about me!

Hello! My name is Marie Cluff, and since I am horrible at keeping journals I thought this would be a good way of keeping tabs on my life. I guess I'll start out by talking about the most important person in my life, my amazing husband Brian. I don't know what I did to deserve such a great guy, he is so good to me. We met in August of 2005, through a friend of ours. He was living in Mesa at the time and I was in Tucson. Long distance relationships aren't supposed to be easy, but it worked out for us. We would stay up all night talking on the phone and instant messaging on-line. I'm actually really glad that it worked out that way. Although I missed him so bad all week, it really forced us to talk, ALOT! After only 2 months, we got engaged! Ya know, when we first started dating Brian told about his family and how his Mom and Dad, and sister got engaged so soon after meeting. I thought that was crazy! I remember thinking to myself that there was no way I would ever get engaged so soon! But by 2 months of dating Brian, I just felt like I had known him my whole life. I KNEW he was the one, and by December of 2005 we were married. After we got married we decided to move to Thatcher, AZ. It was the smallest town I had ever seen, it didn't even have a mall! At first I couldn't stand it, I felt like I was out in the middle of nowhere (and I was!). But eventually I fell in love with that place, and the people there too. It was so nice being close to Brian's parents. I'm so lucky to have such amazing in-laws! They are so good to us, and they really welcomed me into the family from the beginning. Also down there were Brian's good childhood friends and their wives, Clint and Tiffany and Andy and Michelle. I had so much fun getting to know Tiffany and Michelle, they are the best! I miss them so much down here! When we moved down to Thatcher I started Cosmetology School. It was something that I had always wanted to do, but never really thought I could. Ill always be grateful to Brian for giving me the push I needed to do it. He could see that it was something that I really loved, and encouraged me to do it. Its made me realize that I can really do anything. That's one of the many things I love about Brian, he believes in me, even when I don't really believe in myself. I just finished school last week, all 1600 hours of it, and I feel so good! I'm so blessed to have been able to finish before I have the baby. The Baby! A VERY important part of my life right now! I am going to have a baby, and soon! Ayden is due June 15, 2007 but I'm not sure if he will make it till then. He literally feels like he is going to fall out any minute! But he is a tricky little guy, cause he isn't budging. So we will see. Anyways, sorry this is so long but its been a long year and a half!